Nonviolent Communication

Most of us have been taught to communicate passively, critically, or manipulatively––and that’s so normal to us that we don’t even realize we’re doing it. That is, until we find ourselves feeling powerless to get our needs met, repeating the same conflicts with those we love, and feeling alone or trapped in our relationships. The nonviolent framework provides a systematic approach by teaching us to be present to our own needs, feelings, and requests without blaming others or internalizing shame.

I have found nonviolent communication to be extremely helpful in clearer and more accurate expression. Additionally, the use of nonviolent communication bypasses many of the standard miscommunications and perceived offenses of standard conversation, facilitating information flow without argument. Interestingly, the use of nonviolent communication may also make the speaker appear more charismatic and persuasive.

NVC is the practice of making an observation, expressing a feeling, then a need and making a request. Using NVC takes the charge out of communication which can be so painful and threatening to the survival of the relationship. It allows people to take ownership of their experience and not direct their feelings towards others, which usually only escalates conflict and leads to breakdowns. Utilizing NVC makes hearing one another much easier by staying calm & cool.

Do you want to resolve conflicts - with yourself and others - in ways that honor your deepest needs? Do you want solutions that work for you and also meet the needs of others? Nonviolent Communication is about how to make that happen. It's about creating the kind of relationship that helps to meet, or at least honor, everyone's needs. It doesn't always get us what we want, but it greatly increases the chances of truly satisfying our underlying needs.

NVC is the practice of making an observation, expressing a feeling, then a need and making a request. Using NVC takes the charge out of communication which can be so painful and threatening to the survival of the relationship. It allows people to take ownership of their experience and not direct their feelings towards others, which usually only escalates conflict and leads to breakdowns. Utilizing NVC makes hearing one another much easier by staying calm & cool.

I enjoy teaching Nonviolent Communication (NVC) to families and individuals as a framework for difficult, emotion-heavy conversations. I find that it reduces conflicts and makes it easier to discuss tough topics.

Step by step guidelines to express our feelings, needs, and requests.  Applies to communication, setting boundaries, and relationships.

Nonviolent Communication is the reason I became a therapist and the foundation of my work. I have completed several intensive trainings in NVC both in-person and online.

When working on creating better relationships with partners, colleagues, or family members, non-violent communication is essential. I'll introduce the basics, you'll practice, and begin implementing it in your own life.

I believe the way we communicate is very important. The words we choose and how we say them NVC is a way to express our needs and ask for what we want without blaming or accusing the other person. Learning to express our needs in a way that others can hear and receive and maybe even understand and acknowledge their own needs can make relationships flow much better.

I have been using NVC since before becoming a therapist. My partner first introduced it to me back in 2016 as a helpful way to relate to children. But as Marshall Rosenberg made clear, its use can serve people of all ages from any background. This is because the emphasis is on understanding someone else's underlying needs, which we all have. In communicating with "I" statements, recognizing ones feelings and values, and requesting help, we avoid blame, evaluation, and demands that alienate us.

It can be difficult to explore our inner world when we lack the words and structure necessary to communicate them effectively. For years I have incorporated Nonviolent Communication perspectives of human feelings and needs in order to empower clients to request from others what they need out of their relationships. I developed my approach through training with practitioners and Nonviolent Communication trainers as a part of my graduate studies.

I was introduced to Nonviolent Communication (NVC) about 17 years ago and have been drawing upon the practice ever since. NVC is a way of viewing one's self, one another and the world with empathy--truly listening with an open heart. I am inspired by NVC's stance that humans share common needs. In my work, I listen for those needs; to be understood, to have choice, or be considered, to name a few.

I have been working with Nonviolent Communication (NVC) for nearly 20 years. This form of communication supports skills building in emotional awareness, needs awareness, conflict resolution, and more. I am happy to offer support in learning and using NVC, or in simply hearing me offer examples of NVC to the client.